Fit The System, or The System Fits You?
I went to a big hypnosis chain the other week with my mentor. They wanted him to refer them hypnotists. He brought me along ’cause it seemed like fun. They have a very impressive operation. They’re helping lots and lots of people, and they’re financially very successful.
Their pre-scribed plan works really well for some people, but others seem to leave without getting quite what they’re looking for. And that got me thinking.
When you seek help with something, you make a choice: You can go with someone who has a clearly defined and articulated strategy and plan, and risk having them force you to fit into the way that you do things, or you can go with someone who’s going to fit what they do to your particular needs. Of course the risk there is that if they can’t articulate clearly to you what they do, then they might not be that good.)
I’ll give you an example: You can go and learn Kung Fu from someone who will show you the one right way to kick and punch, and mold your body to fit that one right way. Or you can learn Kung Fu from someone who will develop a form that will work for your body style, your strength, your level of fitness.
Often the message of the first instructor is much more appealing, because it is simple to make sense of. And sometimes the second struggles with this, because what they know and how they teach to the individual cannot be easily distilled.
Both have their benefits, but in all things personal growth, from medical care to learning to play chess, we all face a choice as to whether or not we are going adapt ourselves to the expert’s system, or find an expert that will adapt themselves to us.
GO3 Reasons to tell someone “I was hypnotized”
Today, go and tell someone about your experience with hypnosis.
Just say “I was hypnotized and…”
Then tell them what happened, good or bad.
“But why would I do that?” you might ask… Well, here’s 3 reasons why.
1. It’s an opportunity to reflect
Hypnosis leads us to a greater understanding of ourselves. It allows us to think in uncommon ways; to ask ourselves questions we hadn’t thought to ask. In discussing it with someone, you might even reflect on your experiences with hypnosis, and how it has helped you. It might even bring up other questions regarding your own motivations and desires.
2. It’s an easy way to engage people
Most of the stuff we’re going to talk about today is the same stuff we talked about yesterday. Talking about hypnosis is uncommon and interesting. I have this conversation everyday and it always leads to something fun and interesting. If it pushes you out of your comfort zone a bit, so much the better.
3. You’ll get a strong reaction
Good or bad, saying you were hypnotized evokes a response. Some don’t believe in it, some love it, some are confused by it, but few don’t have an opinion one way or the other. Watching their response can be a lot of fun.
So as a small experiment, go find someone to talk with about hypnosis, then please share your experience with me on Facebook.
GOWorking on Yourself Doesn’t Work
We’ve all heard that great story about the three blind men and the elephant. One touches the leg and thinks it’s a tree. One touchs it’s tale and thinks it’s a rope, another touches the trunk and thinks it’s a snake.
Well, when it comes to your own long-standing problems, You’re the blind man.
You’ve been living with the problem for such a long time that you’ve essentially trained yourself to think about that problem the same way over and over and over again.
Luckily, there’s a really easy way to solve that problem. All you have to do is find someone who’s going to think about that problem differently, then ask them for help. If you do even part of what they suggest, you’ll be making progress won’t you?
Here’s an incomplete list of people that have been helping me lately:
Quinn Lampkin, Personal Trainer - He’s helping me build an exercise habit
Debra Meadow, Nutritional Therapist - She’s helping me build a healthy diet
Dr. Tony Murczek, Naturopathic Physician - He’s helping me get healthier- mind and body.
Burt Jurgens, Hypnotist - He’s helping me understand, and achieve my deepest and biggest goals.
Assumptions
“What is the meaning of fate?”
“Assumptions.”
“In what way?”
“You assume things are going to go well, and they don’t – that you call bad luck. You assume things are going to go badly, and they don’t – that you call good luck. You assume that certain things are going to happen or not happen – and you so lack intuition that you don’t know what is going to happen. You assume that the future is unknown.
When you are caught out- you call that fate.”
(Thanks to Idries Shah for providing this story)
GOFix Me
A man comes into the office. He brings his wife. They’re highly uncomfortable, from the get go. He wants me to hypnotize him to quit smoking. I ask him questions, but he doesn’t want to answer them. He just wants me to hypnotize him and make it go away.
I ask him if he really wants to quit. He says yes, but everything else he says says no.
I explain what hypnosis is, that it’s not mind control, and that can’t make him do anything that he doesn’t want to do. I explain that our real goal is to help him uncover the unconscious reasons for why he can’t quit smoking, and that it’s a process which can take 2 or 3 sessions, or even more. He’s not interested. He just wants me to make him quit.
So we start into the hypnosis. We do some basic suggestibility tests, book and balloon, magnetic fingers, magnetic hands. Each time I ask him to do something, he does it as poorly as possible. Even when I ask him to close his eyes he keeps popping them open.
The induction takes a long time. I invite his wife to play along, but she declines, and just keeps shifting in her chair and making noise. He allows himself to be distracted.
At one level, this kind of poor session is my fault. I could have been more flexible, found something to engage him (and her) on. But at another level, there’s not a lot that can be done when the client expects the hypnotist to fail.
He didn’t come back for the second session. I always find it curious when people expect others to be more invested in their success than they are.
GO